So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
