She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
The chlamydia really affected his face.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
