I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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