Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece

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(325): View more from Texas

I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.

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(703): View more from Virginia

I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.

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(910): View more from North Carolina

It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.

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(757): View more from Virginia

i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...

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(646): View more from New York

In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.

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(606): View more from Kentucky

So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with

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(609): View more from New Jersey

Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?

(435): View more from Utah

Yeah.

(609): View more from New Jersey

I was spiderman.

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