I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Randomize
