No awkward lesbian experiences without me
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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