just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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