so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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