I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Randomize
