so that wasnt chicken after all
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
