Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
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