did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
