i just had sex bonerless
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
