i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
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