found the other keg... it's in the tree
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Actions speak louder than pants.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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