Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Randomize
