I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Randomize