Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize
