Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize
