Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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