I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
this is an emotional support booty call
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize
