Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Randomize
