I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
