can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
