This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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