Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
