He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Randomize
