I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Randomize
