That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
