Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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