Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
