And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
My vagina just recognized that song.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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