On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize
