sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Randomize
