it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
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