I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
