So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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