ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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