bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Randomize