Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Randomize
