I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
I cut my penus on the lid.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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