thus making me awesome and them whores
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
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