we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Randomize
