Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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