dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I just found puke in my bra..
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Randomize
