Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
My ass is underappreciated
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
