Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
