Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Randomize
