You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
Is it because I queefed?
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Randomize
