We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
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